When is it that your friend becomes your best friend?
Can you remember the exact moment where the transition takes place? At that moment, you know that this particular person will be the one that you will laugh and cry with for the rest of your life. They have become an invisible shoulder that you can lend on even when they are not physically there?
Can you recall that defining moment?
I was transported back to that moment when I was talking to Wendy the other day on MSN. The conversation started simply as an invitation for her to go hiking with me to MacRitchie Reservoir’s HSBC Treetop trail this coming Friday. But then it became a time of reminiscing of how our friendship started.
Back in JC 1, I wasn’t close to Wendy even though we took the same subjects. In fact, I find her a bit of a social butterfly going from group to group. (This is something which she still hold grudges against me for calling her that) I find her ‘girl school style’ rather hard for me to accept since I was from a neighborhood school. But the turning point came when we both sigh up to go to the OBS Camp during the school holidays. At that time, none of the friends from my clique were there and she wasn’t really on talking terms with one of her good friend who went at the camp. So we were like both lost girl seeking solace in each other’s company. (Like we have a choice right?)
On the 3rd day, we were asked to canoe to the extreme end of the island and hike our way back to base camp. That doesn’t sound too hard right? But try imaging that you were canoeing for half the day under the scorching sun that burns your skin, stung by jellyfish along the way and being thrown into some weird places with just a map to navigate our way back. That’s not all. We were both carrying this SUPER heavy haversack that weighs more than ourselves with 2 jelly cans. I really believe that if it were heavier by 1 gram, I would have fallen backwards. That is the maximum threshold weight I can ever carry.
So both of us were grumpy (I was grumpier), tired and frustrated while trying to decipher the map. Even though both of us were geography students, we just couldn’t understand what those lines are trying to tell us as they are blurred into a big mass of irrelevant lines like children drawing right before our eyes. I was on the verge of crying due to the desperation.
But what really makes me so miserable is the darn heavy bag on my shoulders. I couldn’t even walk ten steps without stopping. Wendy was so patient with me and waited for me the whole time with the same amount of junk on her back. She then did the greatest thing anyone can do for me at that point. She picked up my gigantic haversack and slung it across her front and encourages me to move on.
At this point of time, I must really EMPHASIZE the weight of the haversack. It is really almost equivalent to the weight of carrying another person. So she had 1 haversack behind her and 1 in front of her. Try to picture that scene. I was just carrying both the water can. Haha. I am almost too ashamed to say that.
I don’t know if I am really naïve or being in denial. I actually believe her when she told me that she don’t find the bag heavy at all! There wasn’t even tell-tales sign from her face that shows that the bag was actually killing her. She kept assuring me that it is really not heavy. I thought that she was really speaking the truth and think that I must be really very weak. (But she is a black belt so it is not hard to believe her) Haha.. So I let her carry my load.
It was only the other day when we were talking that she confessed that the bags were really darn heavy. She was on the verge of a breakdown as well. Haha… She has waited 6 years to tell me that.
That was really the defining moment of our friendship.
I saw something in her that I never see in anyone else before. She always thinks of others before herself. That is what I love about her.
Well, I think the reasons why I want to blog about this is because I wanted to remind myself of the that moment I have 6 years ago, remind Wendy that she is still a great person, a great friend to me at this point of time, when she has doubts about who she is becoming.
But most importantly, I think that it is about giving people a second chance to prove themselves. We should not discount them base on our feelings of them as feelings are usually a distortion of reality. If I wasn’t given a chance to get to know Wendy through the camp, our friendship will not even be what it is today.
God is a God of 2nd chance and He never discounts us because of something we did wrongly. He simply look past that mistake and start a clean slate for each of us. That’s the beauty of my God. I thank God I have a 2nd chance with Wendy.
Give someone that chance today.
P.S: I hope Antz won’t read this entry. You know what I’m thinking right Wendy?
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