Zouking

Life is about simple pleasures.

Sitting at the desk, peering through the window secretly admiring the rain, sipping sweet tea and reminising these all too familiar feeling of freedom. Exams, projects and school work all behind me now. Nothing is more important right now than to indulge in my life's most prize possessions - simple pleasures. I thank God for them.

This exact moment is all too good to be true. The chilling breeze caressing my bare skin, the warm feeling in my stomach from the hot tea, the smell of the mixture of rain and soil, sitting at the computer hitting off the keyboard, the freedom I enjoy within. I wouldn't want to exchange it to be anywhere in the world. Not even Aussie. Not really anyway. You know what I mean...

After being through these past few tormenting weeks of studying and being trapped at home, this new-found freedom is really a bonus for me before I begin my routine of work-eat-sleep. Work is starting next wednesday. So technically speaking, I have (counting) 6 days before that. Hooray!

Yesterday unOfficially marks to end of my studying life in poly. Therefore me and the rest of them can't wait to put on our dancing shoes and go Zouking! (me, crystal, yilin, YQ, cassandra, her bf; joe, mais, avril, gary, phyllis) Man, that is THE club. Or rather mambo night. Really suspected that I was born in the wrong era. How can anyone miss out growing up in the mid 60s&70's? The music, fashion, cultural and beliefs are all overwhelmingly rich. I would love to be part of all that culture revolution! And stepping into Zouk last night was like a blast to the past. The music, the hand signal movement/dance, spotting a pseudo Elvis Presley (yeah we really saw him with the exaggerated hairdo) is so rich for me. Soaking into the atmosphere. Maisie and Avril was semi-drunk and saying silly things, swaying from side to side. Haha.. its a classic man! A pity that yilin and crystal gotta run but promise to post up some pictures of yesterday when I got it.

So for today, enjoy the weather, stop and smell the roses. It might just lift the gloomy spirit within you!

Today is the day that the Lord has made, so let us be glad and rejoice with it.

poet in the making

Thank You for the cross






The crown of thorns, the blood you shed and the weight of the cross are borned by You for me.




Why do I felt so alone, walking down this stony road.
You promised that You will never leave me but when I turned around, You weren’t there.
Where are you my Lord, I cried, but You were nowhere within my sight.
You must have not hear me call or even remember me at all.

Why do tears drench my pillow every night, and there is no one there when I cry.
You promised that You will never forsake me but when I turned around, You weren’t there.
Are you there, my Lord, I cried, but the answer never once came by.
You must have not hear me call or even remember me at all.

I went to sleep with tears in my eyes and I had a dream about You that night.
You look so sad and there were tears in Your eyes.
I know You have been crying and I asked you why.
This is what You said to me and I never forget the look in your eyes:

Precious child, oh haven’t I, because of you, I’ve send my dearest son to die.
On the cross of calvery, my son was brutally crucified.
My heart aches beyond description but I have to pretend not to hear him cry.
How I wish I could bring him to my side, but the darkest hour he must die.

Precious child, oh haven’t I, love you so much that I came to die.
I have not leave you nor forsake you.
I have seen all your tears and hear your cries.
I wish You could know that I am always by your side.

Don’t ask me when or ask me why.
You should know that I have loved you with all my might.
You are the apple of my eyes.
My love for you was amplified through the death of Jesus Christ that night.

I wake up the next morning with tears in my eyes.
I didn’t know I was so precious in Your sight.
You are here, my Lord, always there by my side.
Surely You have heard me call and never not remember me at all.

Presentation flop

KTV Frenzy with the PAW gang.




The New and Improved Ubercool haircut. I wish.







Dumb and Dumber. Of course Jorine looks dumber!

Dinner and Fireworks at Marina Bay with My Ladies. Missings are Yi Ling and Xueli .

Pictures are taken 2 weeks ago on the fireworks night. Finally found my nokia pc suite cable and thus the luxury of posting our pictures on my blog.

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Time: 1am

Got a sudden urge to blog and so I jumped off my bed and switch on the computer. Such incidents are becoming rarer. So I guess my muse gotta work overtime tonight. Time for a change anyway.

We learn new things everyday right? So, I've discovered that I'm afraid of public speaking. I used to think that I do alright doing presentation but standing in front of the lecture group today makes me think again. I mean, what's so hard about standing in front of people, allowing them to put on their scrutinizing glasses and inspect every words you say? Besides, you are very well prepared right?

Wrong. Think again. And again.

Words flee from my mind the moment I stood at the lectern. Few seconds later, I manage to find my tongue but did not deliver the impressive presentation that I hope for. Such a disappointment. What exactly happen?

Then upon further thinking, I think it wasn't just stage fright or bad presentation skill but rather it stem from my other personal issues. I reckoned my high expectation, critical nature and fear of people are the culprit behind all these. High expectation makes me want to overachieve and thus exert heaps of pressue on me. Since someone like me can hardly settle for second best, we make sure that we have to be the best before we can have the best. This mentality drove us to the brim of our capability and very often it backfire. And also since I'm rather critical of people, I'll expect people to be critical of me. By standing in front of everyone, it is as if I am exposing myself for citicism. Yuckz The thought of that already makes me shiver. I should probably go easy on others as well as myself.

As you see, it is really tough being me. Haha. How did I survive 22 years of being with myself? A perfectionista. Its really a tough challenge being me. =)

But then something is changing! I'm undergoing a personality makeover for myself. Realised that in the past, I was very depressed and negative. But I've got a CHOICE to change that. So I made that choice and try to be more positive and joyful. It's painful because I'm still paying for the consequences of my old habits. Changes is always painful right?!

Anyway, last week I mentioned that I wanted to join a kickboxing class right? Decided to really get my ass moving. So tomorrow meeting Jorine to sign up for the class and it commence this saturday. Have to start moving those squeaky joints and kick some ass. =) Feel so proud of myself. Because I'm not someone whom will take up something easily. Friends around me are always telling me the stuff that they are learning and I always don't have guts to join in. That has to do with my perfectionist and procrastinating streak. Perfectionist so have to make sure that whatever I join, I have to perform my best and thus not daring to commit. (Don't get me started on this again!) Procrastinating because of perfectionism. (Doesn't make sense?)

So come this saturday, I'll don on my sporty attire and start my exercise regime. That reminds me that I need to go get some sport apparels at the sport shops. $ spent again. *shake head*

Wow, its fast approaching 2am now and I'm still so awake. Before this, I had some bailey (the new bailey caramel, yummy!) to help me get into sleep mode but it seems I'm more awake than a vampire. But I guess I better go do some eyes shut.

Night world.

Planetshakers

It was a long day today. Church service in the morning, KTV session with church's celebration ministry friends and dinner with my ladies. It was really a long day, but definately fulfilling and fun!

Church service was so dynamic! If there is one word I can use to describe it, it will be "Explosive". FCBC was blessed with the Planetshakers during worship and they truely rock the house down. The keyboard guy is cute! =) If you guys does not know who are the planetshakers, they are like the "Red Hot Chilli Pepper" equivalence of the Christian's music scene, only hotter, better and cuter! haha and I am so biased.

Recently I am hanging out often with my church's music ministry friends. We served in the church choir together. Shall call them PAW for short. (Praise and Worship) The KTV was so fun and funny, many thanks to Hope! Shall post up some pictures after I receieved it so you guys know what I am talking about. The thing about them is that there are about 15-20 of us altogether. For those who truely know me, I seldom mix with such big group of people. The maximum I would go is usually 6. So I guess I have a lot of things to get use to. Big group outing is usually very troublesome and involve heaps of waiting time. But it also invloves tonnes of laughters and even more laughters. Till a point i could get stitches.

Then the dinner with them was at Sakae sushi and some major photo sharing session. Xueli's boyfriend finally came out of the closet today. If I still didn't get to see that guy, I will seriously think that my friend, Xueli, is seriously having mental hallucination about her imaginary boyfriend. Haha.. Thank God she isn't. Alright just kidding, she'll probably disown our friendship if she knows I say this but then again, I don't think she knows my blog address. *grinz*

Wayne called me this evening and asked me to go out. =) Too bad that it was too last minute if not I really wish to catch up with him. Haven catch up properly with him for eons. That's the problem with everyone. Everyone is so last minute. We are living in this instant noodle, microwave and emailing era that we expect things to go our way within minutes. Everything should just be a phone call away? I am so guilty of that too but everyone is practicing that that if I don't comply with that rule, I am not cool. Hmmm... Just what the world is going to?

There are so many things to blog about right now but I have to retire. There is a huge presentation tomorrow and I have to prepare the script. Unfortunately, one very irresponsible 'kid' (man/guy was too good for him) from my group decided to play sick tomorrow. (I could probably play doctor too but whatever?!?) So that mean extra load on the rest. But then again this isn't the first time. I reckon that either he is so good at blocking out guilt feeling or he don't even have a heart in the first place. I always believe that if one cannot do small things, how can one accomplishes big things? How can one open and operate a business why one can't even get his ass to school for proj meeting/presentation/or even hand up a DECENT piece of work?

Am i being too harsh here??

NOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
(Pronounce in a very S.L.O.W way as described by Russell Peters when he imitate the chinese shopkeeper)

Fireworks

Earlier, we (jinwen, jorine and meiyun and I) went out for dinner at Marina south and do some catching up. We stuffed our faces with food and we were so bloated thereafter. However the highlight wasn't the food. We were treated with a few million dollars show right before our very eyes. The NDP prelude fireworks. It lasted for about 5 minutes. They are the prettiest thing I have ever seen. They were 'physically' (haha) right in front of us. The gold dust seems to be falling upon us like anointing from heaven. =) God choose the perfect place, weather and companions for me this evening.

The fireworks are really a work of art. And science of course. But to me, there are just magical. But they only lasted for so long. Does all things beautiful only last that fraction of a second? I guess so. Because if we have fireworks all through our life, we wouldn't appreciate the beauty of it. Everything is crafted and perfected in the Potter's hands. And we are merely clays to be transformed into vessels by His hands.

I have a new goal to work towards to. I wanna go ON A DIET. That dreadly phrase that women so love to speak off. But that even dreadly phase that they have to go through. I thought of Briddget Jones. Haha... And of course her granny undies and her fat arse when she slides down the fireman pole. It never fails.

My target is 2kg off by the end of this month. So that means 48 kg by then. Ok ok(my consious is nagging).. I mean 49.5kg, 49.7kg, 49.9kg. Hmmm.. ok ok maybe self denial helps at times. But not times like this. Made some planning with the girls for a badminton session next sunday. I'll probably enroll into a kickboxing class at the C.C downstair after much self persuading. Await my good news. =D

Off to bed now. Church choir tomorrow morning.



For MY power is made perfect in your weakness

Hair cut disaster

I have always been drawing my inspiration material from books but recently I haven't been doing my reading religiously and thus the lack of entries. Probably I could attribute it to my extremely jam-packed schedule from school. Good to know that I have managed to hand in all the work in due time. Remaining is a portfolio (30% done) and a few 'impossible to pass' tests.

I went to have my hair cut yesterday. Now i have really short bangs. Damn I look so weird. I really regretted on not insisting the stylist do what I want rather than what she wants. I think she was revenging on my hair because I've said some really nasty things to her prior to my haircut.

These hair salon nowadays are really blood-suckers. They'll leave the customers sucked dry before they leave their lair. I went to this rather famous hair salon owned by one of the celeb you-know-who. And when she saw me she kept telling me that my hair is soooooo dry, its sooooo ugly because the colours are fading and I must have not gotten a hair cut in months. In order to shut her up and stop her from selling me all those hair packages, this is what I said. "The last time i was here was only 2 months ago, I have a hair cut, colour and hair treatment while I'm at it. If you think my hair really looks unpresentation do you think I should change my stylist?" You should have looked at her stunned face. I'm sure she didn't see that coming. Haha.. I have won back the dignity of my hair.

This coming two weeks will be full of worship and praise session. This evening will be the annual 'festival of praise', next week will be *drummmrrrrrrroooooooooooollllllllll* THE PLANET SHAKERS! Haha... It'll be held at Singapore Expo, Max Pavillion. I have an extra tickets so anyone who is up to it can msg me. It'll be on me. =)

I guess the happiest time I have ever get nowadays is when I am worshipping God. During choir, the air was so charged up and everyone was so into the spirit of worship that all else fades away. The joy in my face finally reflected the joy in my heart. It is in reasonance. =) Everyone should try it.





May the sound of darkness into your marvelous light